Am I wasting all my time?

This Is Your Song

Take a line from a song that you love or connect with. Turn that line into the title of your post.

Blue Rain is a song composed by dj TAKA (alias of Takayuki Ishikawa) and Ryu☆ (alias of Ryutaro Nakahara) for Konami’s line of rhythm game arcades such as Beatmania IIDX and Dance Dance Revolution. It features Aimee Blackshleger’s vocals.

If this were your everyday trance music minus the lyrics, I guarantee you’d instantly get off from your chair/bed/wherever you’re sitting right now just to dance along to the upbeat melody and perhaps stomp those arrows (or buttons) away. This is a perfect match to Dance Dance Revolution‘s game nature. In contrast, the lyrics are just as blue as the song title. It gives you a sense of crying your heart out to wash away the wounds in your heart under the rain. Ah, love… such classic cause for unimaginable pain.

Am I wasting all my time believing someone is waiting for me?

That very line speaks to me the most, which is why I decided it’d be this post’s title as stated by the prompt, anyway. I keep asking myself that question because is there such thing as one true love and soulmate? Or rather, is what my mom keeps telling me so I don’t worry about dying alone as a crazy cat lady in the distant future not a myth?

I believe that thinking about whether I’ll encounter my soulmate is just a waste of time. I should be studying hard to graduate with high GPA, get a high-end job, do whatever I’ve always wanted to do… those things distract myself from thinking how worthless I sometimes feel and how I don’t deserve to be loved. When such things cross my mind, they strip me away from the priceless time I could have utilized to explore what life has in store for me. No, thinking about them is painful; they are something I’d rather be free of, but will always come to me when I’m lost in my thoughts.

I guess that’s the price of experiencing series of painful unrequited love you can never get rid of, huh? In any case, I should keep on living to see if believing someone’s waiting for me is a waste of time or not.

This is the song, just in case you were wondering.

 

I am bound by my pain
Tears fall down like the rain.
Can’t you see, it’s a part of me?
My whole love seemed complete…

All alone
With no hope
How could I
Make your love disappear?

All alone in the night
With no hope left in sight.
How could I finally
Make your love disappear?

Am I wasting all my time,
believing someone is waiting for me?
Is it a dream, or a lie?
Sometimes life just passes by…
Oh why.

Source of the lyrics